I've Lost That Lovin' Feeling

[Africord]

I want to go on record that riding is not life. It may bring joy to your life, but it is not life. Life exists in the loving relationships we have with other people. Riding a motorcycle is only one of an almost unlimited number of ways that can happen. My kids are raised, the last one is getting married later this month, but there are still times when I need to prioritize other activities over riding.

[ridered]

I have that same feeling Seb, but it is about work. Haha.

My dad always loved cars, but hated to drive. Built us go karts, restored hot rods, and worked on race cars, but still hated driving. Maybe you just like being in the shop, or time for a different hobby for a while. You just have to do what is right for you. I bought my VFR from a guy who had ridden his whole life (he was 60ish) and was giving it up. I have a feeling he has a bike again.

Good luck. Maybe try golfing or sailing? Maybe you need something new and complicated to learn to keep the mind fresh?

[luvtoleanit]

Pretty easy to diagnose. One you have too many bikes, get rid of some. A bunch of bikes or a bunch of anything, and I mean anything, collecting things when you can't take anything with you when you go in the ground is pointless and "things" and "stuff" will weigh you down heavily. Simplify, get rid of what you do not need, minimal living is fantastic (only keep or own what you regularly use, get rid of everything else), and extremely liberating. If you don't do this what you own ends up owning you. Keep a bike though, don't sell them all, and take a break. Sounds like you are heavily overthinking all of this, have too much "stuff" laying around, and feels like single threaded madness. Just take a break for the rest of the year or for however long you need. Keep 1-2 bikes, winterize them, cover them, and forget about them for however long it takes. Then go find something else to do. Get a new hobby, spend more time with family, friends, just change it up.

This hasn't happened to me because I take breaks from it when I need to, to maintain balance. I think many of us think that because we own a bike we must ride it all the time. I don't think that way. When I'm not feeling it I don't ride. When I do feel like it I tear it up. I've gone riding seasons where I ride every single weekend, and some seasons where both weekend days are on two wheels for months. Then bam, the next season it's only occasionally. The trick is to have a balance in your life. If you just bam, bam, bam, do one thing, you'll wear it out and get bored with it. You have to have a balance. The same thing happens to me with shooting, I get bored with it and usually it's because I'm just wearing it out ad nauseam.

I will say I have seen this happen on multiple bike forums and email lists many times over the years. I've seen some gentlemen sell everything. Bikes, leathers, pitbull stands, the whole shebang. Not even a year later a "I'm back" post with a new or new-used bike and a re-ignited passion for the sport. The sad thing is they sold their beautiful bikes, well modded, for a loss, then they acquire something else, not as good as what they had before, and the end result is a lot of money lost, thousands, when all they needed was time, a break.

Good luck to you sir. Take a break, get off the forum for awhile, don't do anything drastic, take 6 months or a year then decide what you want to do. Just don't want to see you do anything you'll regret.

[SEBSPEED]

Thank you for all the replies. I'm digesting each one.

I definitely don't want to fire sale everything and lose my shirt. I have quite the work load ahead of me to fix everything up and make it ready for sale. I do plan to thin the herd, but my VFR800 will stay no matter what.

I do have other hobbies that I enjoy, and would like to make more time for. There just never seems to be enough time in the day/week/season.

[LosLobos]

I ride to get nookie.

Y'all are just thinking too much on this.

[crakerjac]

I like the idea of prepping your project bikes for storage. Step away for a while and when you come back, you wont have to re-buy anything you previously sold. My wife has a 2003 Honda Magna that she can no longer ride that I hang onto for that reason.

I don't know you personally, but I read every page of your street fighter build thread and the work you put into that is absolutely amazing. I'm incredibly jealous so I selfishly want you to stick around (like the one hot chick at a party), but do what makes you happy. I cant really add anything that hasn't already been said.

[TimC]

I've had periods where I'm burned out on riding, usually in late July or early August, and usually after I've done a fair amount of riding already that season. There are plenty of "busy life" things that keep me off the bike at times, but sometimes even when I have time to ride I just do something else, or veg on the couch. But I've never had a prolonged period (like months at a time) when I have no interest in riding. It usually passes in a few weeks.

I don't have any advice, Seb. Maybe you'll get your mojo back sooner or later, but I can't offer any ideas that might kickstart your passion again. I definitely sympathize though.

[Switchblade]

I ride to get nookie.

Y'all are just thinking too much on this.

I lost it on that one .

Roll On LosLobos !!

[djtri]

I gave up riding for six years prior to last spring when I found the urge to ride again. Four bikes in one year and and I'm thinking I might have gone to far in the other direction now.But then again maybe I'm just having a senior moment and need to buy a Goldwing.

[YoshiHNS]

It's a time issue. How much time are you spending on the yard? Shooting? Enjoying the patio? Think you just have other things that you're doing, and they are things that you are enjoying (for the long and/or short term), so riding isn't a main drive anymore.

[gradus]

I'd only be worried if you said you don't feel like doing anything. Stay active and chase different hobbies. I've felt the same way for a few years, but try to avoid feeling guilty about not riding. IMO, nothing wrong with maintaining one bike, letting it sit and only putting on a few thousand miles a year. But I do feel guilty about having 2 bikes sitting.

[VFRMAN]

Great thread,very interesting,I'm obsessed about bikes,been riding since I was about 8,took a long break for almost 20 years when bikes hardly ever crossed my mind,I remember saying sometimes I was glad I gave it up because I would probably have killed myself, then I hit 40 and all of a sudden I had to get a bike again,some friends were saying ah that's a mid life crisis!! but the truth is I always loved riding bikes,cant see me ever giving it up now,too many great roads here, I go places here in Ireland I would never have seen if I hadn't a bike,met great friends through biking as well,

just take a break for a while,what's for you won't pass you.

[Beck]

I know what you are feeling Seb,......

In my case, I kinda lost the intense urge to ride after the near miss I experienced with a Lexus almost spreading my guts along an SF Freeway as he passed just a couple of inches from my left elbow with him driving easily over 100MPH on the shoulder to pass me about three/four years ago.... I was going close to 80MPH in rush hour traffic and I'm sure I would have been killed if he did clip me.

I still ride, but that really made me feel more vulnerable on the road (Despite ATGATT) and I find myself lately really hesitating to ride the bike regularly like I used to......

The Lexus driver actually posted an apology to me on this forum which I am very thankful for (Takes a really big man to do such publicly, IMO),.......but unfortunately, the damage was already done to me psychologically......

[rigger4343]

There are some good reply's here so I figured why not chime in too.....

I started riding when I was about 7 years old, I am 39 now. I started riding street bikes when I was 18 and was on and off those and dirt bikes over the years. Sometimes I felt a little guilty about spending time on the bikes. Other times I did not feel like putting all the work into the process of riding dirt bikes. When my little girl was born, I took a break from riding street bikes and moved on to things like Jeeps. Later I ran into some back problems, a cheating wife, a divorce and some major money problems.

I then met a new woman which brought back a lot of energy into my life. I had managed to save enough cash to pick up an older Buell which I started working on and riding. I started to find that I truly enjoyed getting back on the bike and I think I enjoyed learning the new machine just as much and riding it. I enjoyed having a bike again a lot. I then discovered that my soon to be new wife also really loves to ride with me. That really made it fun for me and that is how the Buell was sold and for the second time in my life, a VFR found its way back into my garage.

I do not commute anymore. I only ride on the weekends when the weather is right. Sometimes its just a quick 30 min blast, other times its for a day. Last weekend we had no kids with us and we jumped on the VFR and rode for about an hour because we had a lot to do that day. We rode really slow, checking out houses and cruised down a few dirt roads.

My daughter also wants to ride with me but she knows she has to get a little bigger and older first. I think that will be a lot of fun to do with her when that day comes.

For me, I just like having a bike! Even if I could not ride, I think I would like to at least have one in the garage to mess around with or at least just look at.

I have had many of those days where I thought about not riding anymore but a bike always finds its way back to me a some point. I do not ride in younger groups but enjoy riding with a select few. I think I enjoy a project bike just as much as a perfect bike.

Take a rest from riding for a little while. Discover some new things. Maybe you will find a new way to enjoy motorcycles again. It will come back to you at some point. I do not think I have ever met a biker that did not come back to riding at some point in their life.

Dont over think it!

[Beck]

Just to add,..... I also just bought a new very fun to drive car (Mazda 3S Touring hatchback) just last week, so the VFR will be further neglected, I suspect...... As I am rediscovering the joys of owning a new car again and "tinkering" with it, after 10 long years with the last one....

[VFR4Lee]

I'm pretty sure it will come back Seb, sounds like a case of burn out. Too much to do.

I get a little bored riding the same roads each weekend, but find going out to ride them is better than staying home.

For my own case of burn out, I'm planning a 2 week road trip to AR to visit my daughter, husband, and 3 little guys.

This will be epic, and should stave off the burn for a while.

[checksix]

Seb, your situation sounds perfectly normal. You've simply over-indulged in a hobby and burned out a little bit. Maybe take some time to wrap up the projects you've got and then put things aside for a few years and spend some time with your son. It sounds like he's at a great age to have fun with. It's funny, when I was about your age (I'm 62 now) I had the same burn out. One morning I woke up and decided I was done with bikes and sold my ride (an early Ninja 600). I didn't consult with family, just did it. My son (about 8 at the time) was devastated that I sold "his" bike out from under him. Years later the urge kicked in again and I bought a brand spanking new '07 VFR. By that time my son was in college and also into the race bike / trackday scene. We both still love bikes and spent a whole summer riding together in the TN mountains. Relax, start another hobby and enjoy life. You'll be back riding when the time is right, trust me.

[MVinOZ]

I ride to get nookie.

Y'all are just thinking too much on this.

You might need to expand on this, the only people who talk to me when I'm on the bike are crusted old dudes who "used to have one of those" or "always wanted a bike", not really my type! Does it work & what's the secret?

[midlifeVFR]

Not enjoying the company on rides??? Seriously? After 2 corners you don't have any company............at least not in NY !

I had bikes from 7 years old to 27 years old. A 1968 Benelli and "Then Came Bronson" and I was hooked. I sold my CB750K soon after my first son was born because I didn't have the time or money to ride it any longer. About 7 years later, the first of several Honda XRs came home on a trailer. Over the next ten + years dirt bikes and 4 wheelers were bought and sold but, I didn't have a street bike for about 15 years. The point is (as many have already said) that life is never ending change, adjustment, REadjustment and unavoidable compromise. Fortunately, there's no mileage quota for being a rider or enjoying the sport. Sometimes I'll go a couple of weeks without even looking at the bikes...........I don't even miss it BUT, the first couple of miles of empty road and exhaust tone on a Saturday morning make me feel like a kid again. Stress and worry are washed away by the cool, fresh air ( I'm sure you know the feeling ).

Lose the guilt......you shouldn't have any. Ride when you feel the urge............don't ride because you think you "should" or to make owning a bike "worth it".

Take Jess for a ride to a place you've never been before (plenty of roads you haven't riden within an hour or so of you). You'll both enjoy it IF it isn't a self imposed obligation! The ST is yours for a day if you'd like to ride something better suited for 2.

PS..............please don't wait til September to tell me you're passing the baton for the 2015 Fall Ride............lol.

[vfrurknee]

Trying to keep up with the maintenance on 7 bikes has me kind of overwhelmed myself. Plus with life and work I kind of feel the same way. Recently, I made the same decision Timmy did. I have started selling and giving away parts I had stashed away and thinning down the bike herd. My kids have moved out and it is now time for me and the wife to travel more. The more stuff I get out of the way the more I want to ride. Take a break, find the balance, and life will be better.

Hey Fred, when can I come down and pickup that 4th gen? Anything to help a buddy out!

[LosLobos]

I ride to get nookie.

Y'all are just thinking too much on this.

You might need to expand on this, the only people who talk to me when I'm on the bike are crusted old dudes who "used to have one of those" or "always wanted a bike", not really my type! Does it work & what's the secret?

No secret - u gotta ask, be obnoxious "Hey, HEY ! Ur pretty, take me home with you "

The ladies like dudes on motorcycles but u can't be all shy and shit.

MILF's , minivans, teh holiday inn - allz I'm saying

[gmtech94]

I am in a similar funk ,been riding since 6 raced all kinds of roadrace stuff . I now have a fleet to take care of latest ones all the 2 strokers that I enjoyed but around here speeding is not a real good thing to do hard on insurance and licence . I have only ridden less than 60 miles and have not even had the viffer out yet just need to put in the new battery . The other bikes have gone to the end of the road and back ,my buddies all want to go riding and I have avoided it so far not sure why ,I have a chance to ride a friends race bike for a weekend and can't find the time to go ride even this bike . Not sure what I will do but hope to get it together for sumsum 3 in august .

[keny]

I do have other hobbies that I enjoy, and would like to make more time for. There just never seems to be enough time in the day/week/season.

You have to chose what you want most to do just now and make time for that and let the rest just stand for a while, its the only way around. Its for me the reason my VF500 tank has been upside down on the floor (whit soft non scratching material under) the past 3 weeks.....had other thing to do whit higher priority, like bicycling!

If not you will burn yourself out, and that, you really don´t want to do!

[Dutchy]

Just to add,..... I also just bought a new very fun to drive car (Mazda 3S Touring hatchback) j

That car better have NACA ducts... or else................

[BrianF]

Interesting to read all this, as I constantly wonder if someday I'll lose my passion for riding, and bikes in general. I generally am a "hey look something shiny" type, but bikes have been one of the very few constants throughout my life.

I definitely can see where you're coming from though. I work in the wine business - the last 9 years of my life have been traveling to wine regions, selling wine, meals with wine, wine tasting, wine education, collecting wine, buying wine, reading about wine, wine, wine, wine ad nauseum. It's gotten to the point that, at times, I'm just plain burnt out on it and wonder if I even care about it anymore. Too much of a good thing + it's no longer just a hobby - it's a job.

Also interesting that I enjoy riding a lot more now that I'm single again - no worrying about the effect my [potentially] poor decisions might have on someone else (or feeling guilty for being gone so much etc). I can very easily see how a person's priorities can shift to their spouse, kids, etc., leaving riding on the back burner, or even gone forever. I think that's only natural.

Lastly I think that too many bikes is a real issue. I now have 3 for the first time in my life, and even that feels like waaayyy too much. "I should go ride the _______ because it hasn't been run in a while" is a lot different than "I want to ride."

At least you're self-aware enough to realize the change, rather than just keep doing what you do because you've always done it. Good luck.